Welcome at my quiet little space on the internet. I’m a woman, I’m married with my partner of 32 years, I’m a mother of two sons (of 18 and 22). So? There are countless women who can roughly say the same thing.

And yet, often enough things change when I tell my partner is also a woman and I had to wait twenty years before I could marry her. (and that’s only because the Netherlands were the first country to allow same-sex marriages under the same law as different-sex ones) And that, yes, our sons have been born and raised in a two-mums family. All of a sudden I’m no longer simply a committed spouse and loving a mum, I’m the “but you don’t look like one” or “yeah, I’m sure both love your sons very much, but who’s the real mother” or “that’s so brave of you, sharing such deeply private information with me”

An so I smile and answer “How is one supposed to look like as a lesbian?” and “We both are, and yes, do feel free to think about why that means, and, a free hint, no, it has nothing to do with genes” and “Thanks for the compliment, and you also congratulations on not hiding the fact that you are straight, even in situations no one really needs to know.”

I also happen to be the writer of Ravages and Unspoken. And yes, both novels are relevant to today’s theme.

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